1) You always sit in the last bench with the other class comrades who feel that its possible to get marks sitting in last row. In case of workplace, no girls are there in your project and you have like minded ppl like you as colleagues and wherein your entertainment oscillates between the bars and cinema theaters.
2) You obviously cant groove and dance, and dance around in a group in a disc by just shaking your head or grooving your hip. Desi music directors are your favorites. You cant wait for a bangra number to crop up. Unfortunately, you are too adept at dancing dappankuthu or desi dance, not the americanised western hip hop dance.
3) You perceive discotheque to be a place where you will have a chance to unleash your dancing potential (dappankuthu) and occupy the center stage with 10 other fellow rogues, immediately throwing out the babes from the vicinity of the dance floor. This automatically repels the women from you (they consider you as out of civilization. But, unfortunately we think that we are the only ppl who can really dance)
4) Your Intelliegence quotient mostly can take in just Jackie Chan, Arnold and Stallone flicks. It can take in just action films whose contents can be absorbed. You just can't take any English Romance films. Desi romance rocks. We invariably are the DDLJ and Hum Aapke Hai Kaun types. Shahrukh, Rajni, Kamal, Mohanlal, Mammotty, Chiranjeevi rock. Tom Cruise is a dud!!! and invariably ***...(obv..its becoz of jealousy)
5) You cant eat Spanish, Chinese foods and your fav restaurant invariably happens to be Vasantha Bhavan, Anandha Bhavan, Shanthi-Sagar, types . Of coz we cant forget Karpagam Mess, Mami's kadai and Murugan Idly and max Anjappar, Ponnusaamy. We frankly are clueless as to what are Bella Ciao, Wang's kitchen and things like that, unless we happen to go an a treat organised by the other guyz.
6) You dont see a reason why you have to go to Barristas or Qwiky's when the local corner "Nair Kadai Chaaya" tastes like nectar and satisfies you more than a Barristas. Lime tea is the best tea to have been invented by an human and you are thankful to nair for providing it to you.
7) Most of the jokes you know are adult jokes which you can discuss only with your other fellow comrades and which again takes the oppurtunity from telling a joke to the girl and impressing her. But when you seriously tell very good jokes, the blondes can't comprehend. You have to tell some absolutely "Kadi jokes" (terrible bores) to make them laugh, which you try however, will never come close to.
8) You obviously dont know how to make use of Yahoo Messenger, and you use it to scold your online friends with the best choice of invectives, spread rumours abt other guyz, and ask them to book the latest movie tickets. You unfortunately dont know how to flirt using Yahoo Messenger and are frequently at loss of topics when you want to chat with some girl. Whereas you are deluged with strange topics to discuss with your friend with whom you had lost touch for the past decade or so.
9) While chatting in messenger, you seriously cant start a topic with a member of the oppoisite sex. I have seen guyz chatting with girls purely with emoticons for more than a hour. You can never do that. You will have to crack real dumb jokes to start the conversation or falsely extol them. And bet, you can't do the following:
Boy : What did you have for breakfast??
Girl : I had idli ....
Boy: Is it??? Same pinch, no back pinch, I too had idli. (he slyly pinches her) and laughs.
Girl : Ouchhh (artificially). It hurts.
Boy: Ohh.. I am sorry and (tries to apologise).............then says "I had sambhar for idli."
Girl: (excitedly)..Sambharrrrrrrr............ i had chutney....and giggles...
I swear, I cant tolerate any longer than this................ And this is not a figment of imagination, by any means. I have seen this...Though I agree there may be exceptions..
10) You cant sing a Bryan Adams, Sting, George Michael's song. When someone talks about Linking Park, you cannot even imagine who they are and the closest link you can associate with them is Cubbon Park.
11) You seriously are clueless as to what rock music is.
12) All through college life, you belong to this boyz gang and even in your gang, nobody has a girlfriend. So there is absolutely an absence of the inspirational factor.
With ALL these attributes, it is difficult for guyz like us to fall in love or find a girl. But it is not a sin after all. I guess we are not made for it. We are one among the few in the vanishing tribe. Let us accept that and be proud of that...
We have THE uniqueness that we remain single till we get married and having that trait is really a virtue and who knows, we might be the elite clique in the future.
So all those of you who feel sad that they dont have Gf's, just chill!!! We are not made for it and I swear that for our characteristics, a GF would not have added any value addition and we are better off staying single till 28 or 30. :-).
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