Married..?

Police arrested a drunkard & asked: Where r u going?

 

Man: I'm goin 2 listen lecture on ill effcts of drinking.

 

Cop: Who'll lecture at midnite?

 

Man: My wife...
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Law Professor: Which is the most important LAW of Finance for Starting a
New Business?

 

Student: Father-in-Law!

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Man: Is there any way for long life?

 

Dr: Get married.

 

Man: Will it help?

 

Dr: No, but the thought of long life will never come.

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 Q: Why do women live longer than men?

 

A: Shopping never causes heart attacks, but paying the bill does! 

 
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Wife: If I dismiss the cook and make the food myself for a month, what will
you pay me?

 

Husband: I won't have to pay you, you'll get my entire insurance amount.