A Prayer for the Stressed

Dear Lord,

Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I cannot accept, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those people I had to kill today because they pissed me off.

And also, help me to be careful of the toes I step on today as they may be connected to the ass that I may have to kiss tomorrow.

Help me to always give 100% at work.....

  12% on Monday
  23% on Tuesday
  40% on Wednesday
  20% on Thursday
  5% on Friday

And help me to remember.....

When I'm having a really bad day, and it seems that people are trying to piss me off, that it takes 42 muscles to frown and only 4 to extend my middle finger and tell them to bite me!

Amen